Tag Archives: jobs

The Tale of Career Aspirations


Sadly, the baby’s resume hasn’t yet garnered any interest. However, we are noting a number of things that might indicate a career path for her. She is very talented and we think she’d be happy in any of the following careers:

Based on her interest in my teeth I would say that she would love to be a dentist.

Image from: thewritersmanifesto.com

She has also recently developed a pokey interest in my eyes that could point to optometrist.

Considering her frequent use of “jazz hands” and bouncing to music I’d say she has the aptitude to be a dancer.

Given her tendency to put a second bite of food into her mouth while the first is still in there, it would appear she has the instincts of a competitive eater.

Her ability to make her parents laugh indicate that stand-up comedian could be in the cards.

And of course her outstanding good looks means that model is certainly possible.

What job should we encourage?


The Tale of the Resume


The baby is growing so quickly.

The other day she stated that she feels she should be contributing to the household expenses and would like to get a job. Mostly because she is appalled at the conditions for babies in this house – no wipe-warmer, a stroller that was only 3 digits, hand-me-down clothes. She refuses to live like this any longer. She has been working on her resume (seen below).

She would like something in management as she feels that her experience with her parents lends itself to “giving others structured tasks and providing feedback” (note: she feels “barking orders” is not an apt description of her behaviour and takes offense at this suggestion). Should she be unable to find a place with an employer, she is willing to put her entrepreneurial spirit to the test with her own start-up.

Her top 3 ideas are:
1) Kissing Booth – provided she can find clientele who enjoy an open mouth being pressed to the cheek (with the occasional lick thrown in).
2) Human Vacuum – for a nominal fee she will crawl around your house and consume whatever she finds on the floor – edible or not.
3) Wardrobe Critic – her feedback is a simple Pass/Fail. No puking or snot smearing – you are good to go. Puke and/or snot – you might want to change.

Please respond in the comments if you’d like to contribute to the cost of one of the above start-ups: she is threatening to appear on Dragon’s Den. Or, let me know of any employers looking for the skills described here in her resume: